So, I set a goal for myself to meditate every day – starting at the beginning of December. I’m using my Habitbull app to track my progress (yep, apps intrigue me).
They say it takes 66 days to create a well-rooted, new habit – so I have a ways to go yet. But so far so good … and the reinforcement of creating chains that reflect daily follow-through seems to keep me entertained.
The meditating has been interesting. Just as when I’ve settled in and done this before, I notice how all-over-the-place my mind is. This morning I meandered from stocking-stuffers to killing rats (more on that in another post, I promise). I was constantly bringing my mind back from its wanderings to the task at hand — breathing in and breathing out.
The other thing I noticed was how much time I spent thinking about what I ‘should’ be doing or what I needed to do. That was a path that it was much easier to get lost on. And several times it almost had me stopping so I could get busy ticking items off my to-do list.
Now, those thoughts almost never come up when I am playing Words With Friends or wandering around Liking things on Facebook. The waiting tasks are still as pressing (or not) as when I’m meditating, but I am oblivious to them. Same thing when I’m watching football — although I’m often doing something on my iPad at the same time.
It just makes me realize how disconnected and distracted I am — and how this is a more or less constant state in my life. It’s not that I’m not distracted when I’m on Facebook. But the fact that I don’t even notice it tells me that when Facebooking I’m even MORE disconnected from my life than usual. Layer upon layer of distraction.
Feels like I’ve developed a habit of disconnection. And while I’m not sure what to make of it, it certainly gives me pause and makes me want to get my feet more on the ground.