Yup, that’s what I am doing. We have a new washing machine being delivered between 9:30 and 11:30 AM today, and I am here trying to use the time wisely.
One thing I am sure to do is interact with other appliances. Seems an easy and appropriate activity while waiting for the Sears guy to drive up the driveway. So, I’ll unload the dishwasher and get the coffee ready to drip aromatically at its appointed hour tomorrow morning. Then what?
I can’t vacuum, because then I won’t be able to hear him arrive. I can’t walk the dogs … can’t leave the house, when it comes right down to it.
Okay, I’ll move on to taking ornaments off the Christmas tree (yes, it’s true, we haven’t done that yet).
10:25, so, what’s next? What’s left?
I’d think deep thoughts, but it feels a little weird to put something like that out there, and then do it. It’s an awful lot of pressure.
Deep thoughts are better when they bubble up naturally and seemingly effortlessly. Then they just pop up into the air like spring daffodils, or maybe like little tiny geysers, if you live in Utah or Iceland or New Zealand.
But here in Canterbury it’s almost 10:35 and no washer yet. It makes me nervous, this waiting. Ruins my morning, if you want to know the truth of it. Having someone coming sometime — but I don’t really know when — is a little like waiting for a geyser to erupt.
As someone who had way too much unpredictability to deal with at way too young an age, I am very sensitive to these things. Once the guy arrives it’ll be fine … but the waiting is just killing me.
10:40 … and okay, maybe I am exaggerating a little bit. Or not. I keep looking over my shoulder and down the hill. When will the truck turn up the driveway? Everything is ready. There’s really nothing for me to do, but this small encroachment … no, the waiting for this small encroachment … is stealing my morning from me.
Whatever is going to happen, once it is happening, is something I can deal with. But before it happens, apparently I struggle mightily and don’t know what to do with myself. I’ve never observed the process this closely. I’m in suspension and I don’t like it. I have time here in my hands, and I don’t know what to do with it — not at all.
10:45 and I’m thinking this probably has something to do with mortality. Doesn’t everything?
There, a deep thought … now back to the Christmas tree!