To Phillies: Stop losing one run games, okay? The universe is doing everything it can to get you into the post season … but you have to help!
To Chase Utley and Ryan Howard: Relax. Just do what you do. You’ll be fine.
To Ken Mehlman: Glad you’re at peace now, buddy … but either your ability to compartmentalize and/or delude yourself is seriously concerning or you are one of the more despicable people on the planet. I hope you take more time to really, really assimilate what you were complicit in … the damage done. Of course, the gay community is generally being more welcoming than JordanCornblog …
Many high-profile LGBT activists have already embraced Mehlman since his announcement earlier Wednesday. “We hope the fact that Ken Mehlman has reached this level of honesty will now encourage other political leaders to reject divisive anti-gay campaign tactics which, as Mr. Mehlman now admits, are purely cynical attempts to manipulate the American public,” Gay and Lesbian Victory Fund President and CEO Chuck Wolfe said in a public statement.
It’s that “purely cynical” part that eats at me, Ken. But I guess I’m glad that you can frame it as such. When you become a Democrat, I’ll actually embrace you.
So, there’s more to look forward to, big guy!
To Self: Get draft picks all set for FFootball … the draft is at 6AM on Sunday morning 8/29/10!
To Dick: Tick, tick.