Today is the 35th anniversary of my friend Beth Allen’s death by suicide. June 20, 1978. I was 25 years old and living in Ardmore, PA when I learned of her death.
She was 25 years old, too. We were both November babies, born @ 3 weeks apart in 1952. She was way too young to die by her own hand on June 20, 1978. Indeed, she should be alive today, but she didn’t make it through this day in 1978 … and so, I think of her on June 20, 2013.
Beth (on the left) in 1970 – senior year at Haverford High School
We were classmates, starting in second grade, all the way through high school. Beth was an amazing athlete and an especially wonderful lacrosse player, swift and graceful, with seemingly endless stamina. Her lacrosse skills eventually took her to the US National Lacrosse Team…not as sexy in those days (or now) as the US Soccer Team…but an amazing accomplishment. We’d occasionally cross paths at lacrosse tournaments in college and after…but for the most part I had lost touch with her.
I majored in Religion in college…and was decidedly less religious when I graduated than I had been when I started. Beth, as I remember, was more so…moving deeper into a strain of Christianity that I was moving far, far away from. That certainly contributed to our losing touch.
I had embraced feminism and was grappling with my sexuality. And back then Beth was involved with a fairly conservative, fundamentalist strain of Christianity, and was teaching at a Christian School – Delaware County Christian School to be precise.
I don’t really know why she felt that she needed to take her own life, but I have my suspicions. And I often wonder why she could find no help or support at her place of work or within her community. Did the brand of Christianity that she called home back then offer solace or push her toward despair? I’ll never know but, as I said, I have my suspicions.
So here I am in 2013. It was an excruciatingly beautiful day here in New Hampshire yesterday. The sky was blue, the sun warm, the air clear…with the smell of just-mown grass, Sweet William and new budding Roses on the June breeze.
I took my 60-year old legs for a long walk through the Canterbury afternoon and thought about Beth, whose walk ended so long ago.
Beth’s Obituary.
What loss. What waste. What a sad, sad, sad thing. June 20, 1978.
I remember sitting at the dining room table in the house I was living in on Church Road in Ardmore. Beth was dead. I was alive.
JordanCornblog circa 1954 or 5 Drinking orange juice on a sunny summer morning at the lake. I can just feel the warmth of that rock I am sitting on … and how the summer day stretched endlessly!
Okay, so here’s what I am thinking this morning, as the first Monday of March dawns on a sequestered nation. (And no, these aren’t political musings … tho’, unfortunately, the recent destructively stubborn, ideological and bone-headed misbehavior of Congress was the first thing that came to mind as I thought about the new week.)
I was thinking about acceptance as I was looking out the window at the bare trees and snowy landscape. Something got me thinking about what strikes me as a deep irony about the concept of acceptance.
Ready? Building the suspense – here goes:
Acceptance is the only solid basis there is for real change.
This is because you have to know where you are in order to make changes.
But then you have to accept where you are before you can really know where you are.
And by accepting where you are I mean an open-hearted, compassionate, unconditional acceptance. Give it to yourself fully, without knowing all the details up front. (It’s the “mere” fact of acceptance that is so opening. It allows you to disclose information about yourself to yourself that your inclination might be to keep hidden. It frees you from that burdensome and blinding self-criticism and opens you to clarity.)
I think it’s at once ironic and absolutely true: The only thing that opens the door to what can be is the full and compassionate acceptance of what is.
Oh, and while I think that this applies to human beings, I do not believe that it applies to legislative bodies (even if they are made up of human beings). Just sayin’
Being/becoming my own best friend and accepting every single molecule of who I am is at the heart of this journey.
It sounds so simple. It is so powerful.
Relaxing the shoulders, exhaling, and accepting opens up possibilities that striving can’t even imagine.
So that’s what I think this snowy morning.
Addendum: Obviously it’s been awhile since I visited here. Hope to be more regular (ah, we’ve heard THAT before)! Anyway, I was surprised to see an ad pop up in this post, so clicked the link for more info and here’s what I found:
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And the President reading the names of the dead, yet another time, should be all that it takes to pass meaningful gun legislation.
The reading of the names of the dead should shame the NRA beyond silence into something like contrition.
The reading of the names of the dead should convince our tanned, narrow-eyed, soft-bellied, strict-constructionist, frighteningly repressed, bullying and cowardly legislators to forego the donor money just-this-once and protect the children who, I will remind them, were once fetuses (and thus, important).
The reading of the names of the dead should maybe, hopefully, NOW convince American voters, and most especially American men, that gun control is not synonymous with castration.
I’m thinking that the whole idea of “deserving” has to be one of the most destructive concepts to cross the horizon in the span of human history. After seeing a recent “Like” on Facebook by a high school acquaintance who married lots of money, I really started mulling this.
She ‘liked’ Mitt Romney. I’m sorry, but it always puzzles me, this liking of what to my mind is such a painfully unforgiving and shallow enterprise these days (aka pretty much anything emerging from the GOP).
But then I thought that it is probably comforting, if you are very wealthy, to feel that you somehow deserve it. Deserving it would make it all right, I guess, that you have all that square footage and silverware when people are living in cardboard boxes within a 10 miles of your mansion.
That’s because if you deserve what you have, then you can also believe that they deserve what they get.
That must be why god is so important in this worldview, too. After all he (and I do mean HE) is the one who decides about all this having and getting and deserving. You really don’t have to worry about it too much. God sorts it all out – and in the end everyone gets and has what they deserve. (So, I guess in some ways the real question is, what is ‘the end’ and how do we know when we’ve gotten there?)
My worldview, as you may have surmised, is quite different from the one described above. And I want to ask my Facebook friend if she really believes that anything more than accident and happenstance separates hers from the life of a young man scratching out a hardscrabble existence in North Philly. Does she ever imagine what her day, today, would be like if she had been born in Iowa or Tanzania? What if she had been interested in field hockey rather than cheer-leading? What if her father had died young or her sibling had been born with special needs? What if she hadn’t been ‘pretty’?
Do we really deserve the small accidents and coincidences that can so profoundly affect our life stories? Does the woman I talked to last week – the one who’s been living with a toothache for months because she can’t afford to do anything about it – really deserve that?
Last night as I was closing the door to the chicken coop I glanced to my left and saw a hazy, crescent yellow moon hanging above the woods. Through the dusty barn window, across the expanse of uncut field, it looked as timeless as it is, that moon. And I felt equally timeless, connected to others who’ve glanced through barn windows and been captivated, briefly, by the moon.
That was a life-saving feeling once for me. Never forget stepping away from the violent bombast inside the house one winter night. This was in suburban Philadelphia, so nothing bucolic about it. I lay in a snow bank we had built for an igloo (unfinished … never finished) and looked up at the sky. And for those moments I felt quiet and connected to a universe that was far more benevolent than anything happening inside my home. Alone and okay. That was a really good feeling.
Megan Rapinoe is the MVP so far – can she keep it up?
And can the US Women avenge their World Cup loss to Japan?
Stay tuned … and in the meantime, here’s a thoughtful post shared on From a Left Wing. (I haven’t even had time to read the whole thing this morning – that’s how thoughtful I am!) Enjoy – I’m off to work – and will be watching the match tonight – so DON’T say anything!
A man with guns. Four guns. The kind that can shoot hundreds of times … fast.
And we need these in America because?
Explain to me, NRA, why someone in America needs a Glock or an assault weapon? How many people need to die, on the off chance that somewhere, somehow, someone with a weapon might be able to stop another person with a weapon from killing a lot of people.
As Annie Lamott said to the NRA in a post on Facebook (and yes, I am quite sure that they hang on Annie’s every word) … and this is not a direct quote … They can keep their little handguns and their shotguns and rifles … but let’s AT LEAST get rid of this assault stuff.
People are dying … and people who are unhinged have it in their power to do things that they and their families will forever regret and suffer for. All around, you have to ask, how long will we let the NRA and the gun manufacturers and the legislators they own keep putting this nation through senseless tragedy after senseless tragedy?
So, I’m perusing the news this morning … not anything you want to do lightly these days.
It’s Aurora, Colorado, right now, in the blaring red typeface on the MSNBC landing page. 14 dead, dozens injured. Just letting that fact sink in on a sunny morning in NH. 14 dead and dozens injured.
So, simply going to a movie in this country riddled with guns and desperation has become a dangerous pastime. Makes me think of one of my old favorite poems by Denise Levertov. The pathos of hopefulness, indeed …
Innocent decision: to enjoy.
And the pathos
of hopefulness, of his solicitude:
–he in mended serape,
she having plaited carefully
magenta ribbons into her hair,
the baby a round half-hidden shape
slung in her rebozo, and the young son steadfastly
gripping a fold of her skirt,
pale and severe under a handed-down sombrero —
all regarding
the stills with full attention, preparing
to pay and go in–
to worlds of shadow-violence, half-
familiar, warm with popcorn, icy
with strange motives, barbarous splendors!
Seems the lines between reality and fantasy have been breached. We don’t know … we can’t feel … the difference.
And then I think of Penn State and of how, whether you’re talking about the Roman Catholic hierarchy or a college football powerhouse, the protection of wealthy and established institutions trumps the protection of children every time.
We are a culture that’s scared to death. We don’t know ourselves. We are afraid of the world we live in. We blame the wrong things. We take the wrong actions. We stridently proclaim rigid moralities, as if they could hold us together.
But it’s our hearts that are dying. Fearfully, we don’t let anything unfamiliar touch them. Walled off in our little fiefdoms, we know one another less and less. Reality, full-hearted and alive, is like a receding horizon. We are nostalgic for it (as we are for tomatoes that actually taste like something) … but we don’t know how to get there.
It’s scary, getting there. You have to risk and soften and reach – at a time when that seems like a really dangerous thing to do.
Okay, now this is a set-up! Whatever possessed me to use THAT as my title this morning?
I’m writing in the kitchen on my iPad, using the WordPress app, and I’m afraid I don’t even see an option to save this without publishing it. Nope … The only button I see says “Publish” in a rather vivid and uncompromising way.
So here I am, well into my cup of coffee, committed to writing something deep before I hit that danged button. Why couldn’t I have written something like ‘Phillies Lose Again’ for my title? I can write those posts in my sleep.
Speaking of sleep, last night was my first night in my room with the new windows installed. I’ll upload a photo when I get back up there. It’s lovely, having the night sounds wafting in – not to mention the night breeze. Summer can be such a soft season, here in NH.
The process of getting those windows installed has been an interesting emotional journey for yours truly. Being uprooted from my room and my routine has been a challenge. And one of the things I’ve discovered is that challenges, when embraced, are always positive. (And when fought and lamented, they are always negative.) It’s probably not news to you, but for me it’s like a new discovery every time I stumble upon it.
So, what challenges? Well, for me they centered around being uprooted and then also having my expectations be out of sync with the actual progress of the project. I’d come home from work, thinking I’d be able to reclaim my space, only to find that things weren’t close to being done. That would plunge me into crankiness … which I would then leaven with despair. “Ruined, everything is ruined!”
Happily, I have come to recognize those feelings as red flags rather than reflections of reality. The actual facts being very different from what my feelings would have me believe, it’s still true that the feelings are real and to be honored … in their proper context. That’s the key for me. Those feelings of displacement, betrayal and despair have nothing to do with a window replacement project in 2012 New Hampshire and everything to do with still-to-be-explored stuff from my earlier years.
The metaphor of windows applies really nicely here. The challenges really are openings, and if I see them that way, well … let’s just cue the uplifting music here and move on.
Have a great day (and I’ll correct the typos later)!
Licorice Pizza: I'm starting anew here and have now been, twice, to Vax and Snax at Red River. These are Thursday night movies for vaccinated and masked folks, and you can get POPCORN! But I digress...Licorice Pizza was a sweet, coming-of-age in The Valley in the Seventies sort of movie that managed to include waterbeds and Jon Peters and two new stars -- Alana Haim and Cooper Hoffman (son of Philip Seymour Hoffman).
If Beale Street Could Talk: Quiet, beautiful, heartfelt, devastating. America wears many masks. This movie strips a few of them away. It shines a light on quite a lot of ugliness. As well, it illuminates dignity and resilience in the face of a system built on the abuse of privilege and power. A perfect movie to see on the eve of what is hopefully Donald Trump's last SOTU.
Shoplifters: A beautifully honest, quiet movie that is at once uplifting and devastating. Universal questions are raised and left open for pondering. What is a family? How do people survive in our world today? And how do we judge their choices?
Green Book: Very enjoyable movie and yet deeply flawed. The white guy comes across as the hero in ways that are typical for the American movie industry, and comfortably misleading in terms of the realities of our culture. Especially in the current socio/political atmosphere, can't we do better than this?
On the Basis of Sex: We applauded, we cried, we felt so glad that RBG was as prescient as she was. And I felt personally glad that her love of opera clearly predates her connection with Scalia. What an inspiring woman -- and a good movie about her early years as a student, professor, and attorney.
The Favourite: Did I say that being a queen was no fun? This definitely seems to have carried forward to Queen Anne's reign. Strong performances again, and more belly laughs than you'd think. And right along with it, grief, emptiness, ambition, and gouty excess.
Mary Queen of Scots: Being a queen was no fun in the 16th century. Excellent, complex performances in this one. I found Elizabeth especially compelling. Very unclear who actually wins out in this one.
Another Year: Loved this one! It's about a couple, and their friends, and their lives – painful in spots, and wonderfully everyday and enriching, to my mind. Great performances – and who knew there was so much wine being drunk in England!?
Tiny Furniture: A young woman (aka Lena Dunham) comes home after graduating from college and tries to find herself – or not. A character study that I found humorous and touching – and sometimes a little disturbing and/or self-indulgent. It's definitely a privilege to have the leisure to "find oneself." After this..."Girls."
Rabbit Hole: Painful/powerful movie about loss and grieving. Hard to watch but well worth the effort, with a strong cast and an especially on the mark performance by Nicole Kidman. I continue to be glad to see that she is clearly outstripping Tom Cruise as an artist. You go girl!
The Kids Are Alright: Very enjoyable movie with great performances and an excellent cast. Two kids whose moms are lesbians decide they want to find out something about their "father" – and everything moves on from that point.
The King's Speech: Warm, funny, inspiring – and apparently a bit of a rewrite of history, to boot! Colin Firth puts out an amazing performance – and was well rewarded for it. Everyone else is great too, and if you're one of the few people left who hasn't seen it, it's definitely worth a look!
Black Swan: This is a disturbing movie that I really loved – and in case you haven't noticed, I do have a tendency to like disturbing movies. What's real and what isn't? You be the judge. Also, be on the lookout for Winona Ryder – you'll never recognize her!
Blue Valentine: A couple in trouble – how they started and how they got to where they are. A good movie with excellent performances that left me wondering, especially in Michelle Williams' case, whether she was thinking about what's his name (her partner who died suddenly – the guy who starred in Broke Back Mountain – for some reason I can't remember his name – oh yeah, Heath Ledger).
Shutter Island: A dark period piece that has the creepy feel of the 1950s (creepy to me at any rate) and has stayed with me more than I would've thought. A movie with surprises – definitely worth a look.
Cyrus: I don't remember this one so well, but have a vague recollection of walking out of the theater feeling not so enthralled. I believe it's supposed to be funny – but as you can tell it didn't really make an impression.
I Am Love: Really beautiful, sumptuous movie that made me hungry, just watching it. A keeper!
The Girl Who Played with Fire: The second in the three part series involving the girl with the dragon tattoo, this movie was much harder to watch than the first, as Salander's triumph isn't quite so clear at the end. Painful, painful, painful.
Scott Pilgrim Versus the World: I loved this comic book take on young love. Went to the movie on a whim and came away very happy to have seen it! Quite a few laugh out loud moments – and touching, as well.
Going the Distance: A very lightweight romcom that kinda left me feeling like I had just spent an hour and a half reading People magazine. In other words, pretty much a waste of time.
Never Let Me Go: Wow! This was an amazing, stark, and moving movie about kids who are basically raised to become organ donors. Very much worth seeing.
The Town: Ben Affleck's movie about bank robbers. It's okay. Not great, but okay. It does make me curious about Charlestown – will have to go there one day.
You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger: A Woody Allen movie that I honestly don't remember very well. It's pretty much about adults behaving badly – something that Woody knows a little something about.
The Social Network: The movie about Facebook. I found it very interesting and well done, and was especially fascinated/disturbed by the window on the incredible privilege and elitism still thriving at undergrad Harvard.
The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest: Number three in the Dragon trilogy. I found this, in many ways, the weakest of the three movies – although that's not to say that it was weak. Perhaps my enjoyment was affected by the fact that I hadn't read the book. Anyway, it's a great trilogy and I was sorry to see it come to an end.
Fair Game: The movie about the Valerie Plame affair. One of the things that I found most interesting was how it uncovered my own biases, as she was clearly a very serious and talented agent, but because of her blonde haired beauty, I pretty much assumed that she was a lightweight in real life. I appreciated, also, the depiction of her husband as a bit of a media hound, which was how he seemed to me at the time. And of course, there are the despicable characters of the Bush administration. Glad they were on display in all their glory!
City Island: This was a fine, if predictable, movie about a family in which everyone has a secret and is telling lies. I mostly loved it because it gave me a glimpse of where my friend CB lives!
Winter's Bone: Wow! Unrelenting, stark, and ultimately uplifting – at least to my mind. This is a painful movie about life when you're the daughter of someone who runs a meth lab. Winter's Bone is a perfect title. J-Law is amazing!
Please Give: Quirky, sweet, slice-of-life movie. I loved the low-key character development and good humor of it all. Enjoyable, with a great cast and few false notes.
The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo: Tho' parts of the book were missing, this was an excellent rendition of an excellent book. Not for the faint of heart, tho'! Lisbeth Salander is an Emma Peel for the 21st Century (watch for more from Noomi Rapace - I will be)!
Me and Orson Welles: Or was it Orson Welles and me? (If Orson had anything to do with the title, I'm guessing the latter.) I thoroughly enjoyed this movie, even as it reminded me of why the world of the theatre holds absolutely no appeal for yours truly! Nice to see Claire Danes back ... still have to finish watching Temple Grandin, too!
Crazy Heart: I left this movie thinking ... "Eh?" but it has stayed with me. Jeff Bridges does give a wonderful performance. The amount of smoking and drinking was nauseating - as I guess it was supposed to be - all in an understated, Jeff Bridges sort of a way.
A Single Man: One of the best movies of the year in my book. Haunting, beautifully acted and filmed ... marred only by an unnecessarily heavy-handed ending, IMHO. That was the only flaw in an otherwise brilliant bit of artistry. Colin Firth was perfect, and this was an amazing writing/directing debut for Tom Ford! See it!!!
Young Victoria: I am eternally grateful to have not been born the heir to a throne. Life was confusing enough! This was an enjoyable, tear-jerker of a movie that left me wanting to know more about the details. Perhaps a bio for Bookeaters?
Precious: Wow, wow, wow. Two weeks in a row - another amazing movie at Red River. This is a challenging and important movie ... about life in America ... every single day ... everywhere.
The Messenger: Wow, wow, wow. This is one of the best movies I have seen in quite some time. Its focus is on two men who notifiy NOK (next of kin) when a soldier dies. It is a raw, wrenching, unflinching and uplifting journey - not to be missed. Seriously
Damned United: This was a study in soccer, ambition, and friendship. For soccer buffs who actually know the players (I'm a late-comer to the game) the movie would be that much better. I loved it, though - and recommend it highly.
A Serious Man: The Book of Job envisioned by the Coen brothers evoked the early sixties and suburbia with humor, pathos ... and a slightly nauseating quality that tells me they pretty much hit the nail on the head. As one of the goyim, I am sure there were hundreds of nuances that were lost on me ... but I loved it (nausea aside) nonetheless!
Cold Souls: The premise of this movie is deeply strange, yet it is presented in an entirely believable way. It's by turns very moving and then hilarious (in ways that, in retrospect, are hard to capture/explain). The ending leaves a puzzled feeling - but that's not really bothersome. In many ways, puzzled is the appropriate way to walk out of the theater after "Cold Souls." Check it out!
Adam: Nicely done! Not a movie that will stay with you for a long time, but I liked it. The father (Peter Gallagher) seemed a tad overdone -and unnecessarily so. Unmemorable soundtrack - but since I mention it, does that make it memorable? Now I'm starting to feel like Steven Wright - not necessarily a bad thing!
Taking Woodstock: Even going in with low expectations, this offering from Ang Lee just wasn't good. Vilma was a high point in an otherwise shoddy effort. Harsh, eh? And watch out, world - it's only 6:30 AM!
Julie and Julia: I was not as bothered by Julie as some reviewers were - maybe because I liked seeing a blogger hit the big time. Meryl Streep was amazing as Julia .. and this is definitely not a movie to see on an empty stomach! Never have I enjoyed watching people eat as much as I did watching this flick!
500 Days of Summer: I think I wasn't supposed to, but I loved it. Engaging characters and script, great soundtrack. Not as quirky and lovable as "Away We Go" - but not far behind, either.
Whatever Works: People either like or hate this latest offering from Woody Allen. I must admit that it's a little weird to see this May-December relationship on-screen, feeling so creeped out by Woody's real-life choices. But I'd say he pulls it off. There are some really great lines throughout the movie, and while not entirely believable, I didn't mind being along for the ride. A pleasant diversion for sure.
Goodbye, Solo: Interesting movie that basically contrasts life energy and death energy, IMHO. Solo is the epitome of resilience - love him! Meanwhile William seems bent on being miserable, for reasons that the movie leaves mysterious. I didn't find him very a likable or compelling character - but Solo makes up for it.
Moon: I hesitate to write this one up, as I was tired when I saw it - and missed portions. But form my bleary vantage point, this seemed an intriguing movie set on the moon and exploring themes of identity, isolation, etc. It was not my usual fare - and I wasn't up to snuff - but at least had the wherewithall to be able tell that it was quality work!
Cheri: I liked this a lot better than Easy Virtue - maybe because I went into it having already seen EV and had my expectations lowered. Michelle Pfeiffer and Kathy Bates are fun to watch as always - and I liked Rupert Friend in the title role. It all got a little too serious at the end - a tone-shift that didn't quite fit with the bulk of the movie. Still - a pleasant diversion on a rainy July evening!
Away We Go: This was an excellent movie in every regard. Great dialogue and plot line, endearing cast/characters, heartwarming/funny story that avoids tipping over into overly-sweet territory ... and great soundtrack, to boot! See it, if you haven't already.
Easy Virtue: Not my cup of tea - but I suspect it would have helped, going in, to know that this was a movie based on a Noel Coward play. The characters felt stilted and unbelievable to me, as it was - and I couldn't muster much concern for what became of them. All things considered, I'd rather have been in Philadelphia!
Sugar: Sugar is a baseball flick that is sweetly and realistically done - and definitely like no Hollywood film on the subject. The characters are real and the life is hard - and the film depicts it all in a matter-of-fact way that brings the realities home more surely than something more "dramatic" ever could. Two thumbs up on this one!
Sunshine Cleaning: Director Christine Jeffs has a winner in this tale about the hard times and resiliency of the Lorkowski family. Amy Adams, Emily Blunt and Alan Arkin shine in this movie about a bio-hazard clean-up company. Yes, that's correct. And the movie had the potential to cross the line into sappiness several times but demurred. For that I am eternally thankful. (Okay, eternally may be a little over the top.) Darn good flick, though - check it out.
Milk: Sean Penn deserves an Oscar for his amazing portrayal of Harvey Milk. It actually didn't even feel like a portrayal - more a channeling. Such a loss - that yet another creative and energetic and good leader, was senselessly murdered all those years ago. Fear, hatred and guns - why don't we remove at least the last ingredient in the tragic mix?
Doubt: Meryl Streep and Philip Seymour Hoffman are amazing, and Viola Davis is a heartbreaking revelation in this battle royale. I was left with less doubt at the end than some of my compatriots ... but that took nothing away from the experience. Meryl Streep deserves an Oscar, IMHO ... and I definitely want her on my side, always!
Slumdog Millionaire: Just a great movie, start to finish. Magical,epic, and a nail-biter (even though you know what's going to happen ... pretty much. The dancing at the end did my heart good - and having M.I.A. in the soundtrack didn't hurt, either!
The Secret Life of Bees: Or was it The Secret Lives of Bees? Anyway, whatever - I want Queen Latifah to be my mother!!! (What was Bill Clinton thinking, throwing her under the bus all those years ago?) The movie was entertaining but not a home run by any means. Too predictable ... but Alicia Keys was wonderfully cranky-verging-on-scary and the Queen was queenly and the honey looked delicious and it was nice hearing India Arie in the soundtrack!
Happy Go Lucky: I think I was supposed to like this more than I did. Perhaps it suffered by being seen pretty much on the heels of Rachel. I found Poppy to be a sometimes intriguing and sometimes annoying character. The relentless joking and "upbeatness" felt distancing and unnecessary. I didn't hate this movie by any means - but something was missing for me.
Rachel Getting Married: Jonathan Demme and an amazing script and cast just blew me away with this effort. The characters are fascinating and complicated and most every interaction in the film left me engaged and wanting to know more! Debra Winger was stupendous - although it's been so long since I've seen her that I kept trying to find the bull-riding Urban Cowboy persona within the steely, distant mother of this wedding movie. (She's not there.) Margot at the Wedding was very good - but Rachel puts her in her place. I highly recommend this to everyone!
Religulous: Bill Maher skewers the rampant "illogic" of religion in this free-wheeling film. His wit is right on target and as barbed as you'd expect. I found myself squirming every once in awhile. I don't mind you picking on the Pope, Bill ... but same as with Michael Moore ... sometimes when you set up "common folks" to look like fools, I cringe. Still, Religulous is worth a look for sure. The best point Bill makes? That conservatives of a religulous bent are about finding answers - while liberals are about asking questions. I can go with that!
Roman de gare: This was an intriguing, surprising, suspenseful, funny, quirky movie that I thoroughly enjoyed. The characters and plot lines are deftly developed. You should definitely check it out if you get the chance!
Young at Heart: YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS MOVIE! It's a documentary about a choral group of octogenarians in Northampton, MA. Very inspiring ... definitely something to check out!
Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day: Enjoyable, light fare with a stellar performance by my favorite police chief, Frances McDormand!
The Visitor: Now this was an excellent movie ... from start to finish. It was similar to Smart People in that it had an academic as the main character. However, all similarities ended pretty much right there. In this warm, funny, and wrenching movie, the characters are well and subtly developed, the plot is (unfortunately) believable ... and there are no false notes. I would urge you to see it - you won't be sorry!
Smart People: Looks like we're getting back on track with our Tuesday night movie schedule ... for the time being. Smart People was enjoyable but left me unenthralled. (It probably didn't help that we ran into a totally enthralled movie-goer on the way in who was seeing it for the second time. High expectations may have killed this one for me.) Overall, I found the characters exaggerated and mildly unlikeable ... the dialogue stilted and self-conscious, perhaps just the way smart people talk. But then the lessons about loosening up and being less self-absorbed weren't exactly ground-breaking. Overall, it wasn't a wasted evening ... but not a movie I'll be putting at the top of my list, either.
4 luni, 3 saptamani si 2 zile (4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days): Winner of the Palm D'Or at Cannes, this film by Romania's Cristian Mungiu certainly deserves the accolades it receives. It's a realistic and emotionally unflinching story of a woman who helps her friend obtain an illegal abortion in 1987 Romania. The story is harrowing, the acting wonderful, and the cinematography amazing. This film makes Juno look like Disney pablum!
Taxi to the Dark Side: This was a harrowing and eye-opening look at what our country has become under the leadership of Bush/Cheney after 9/11. The "road taken" has definitely been a trip to the dark side. Disgusting and important to see ... as we make our way back toward the light!
Michael Clayton: What an excellent movie! Engaging, engrossing, well-acted. Tilda Swinton certainly deserved an award for her protrayal of what I have to think must be the secret, inner life of Condi Rice.
Persepolis: This animated memoir is an engaging, heartbreaking, uplifting, realistic look at life in Iran during the Islamic Revolution. Go see it! It humanizes what our current regime so consistently tries to dehumanize. An important movie, Persepolis is based on the book by Marjane Satrapi.
Margot at the Wedding: Dark, funny, tough to watch and very well acted.
I'm Not There: Bob Dylan's not my favorite, but this was a fascinating movie to watch (albeit long) and since he wasn't there, I couldn't very well feel annoyed by him. Cate Blanchette was just amazing - and I loved the surreal, Fellini-esque feel of the Richard Gere parts.
Atonement: Lush, compelling, painful - I especially loved Vanessa Redgrave's starkly powerful 5 minutes - and the Fellini-esque (can you tell I love Fellini?) flavor of the scenes of the evacuating troops on the beach - complete with ferris wheels - somehow depicting the disorienting horror of war in ways that blood and gore never could. Great movie!
Juno: Well, I went to see it. I totally agree with my friends who found the clinic scene extremely misleading, off-base, and gratuitously negative in its depiction of the women's health movement and its workers. In an otherwise nice movie, this was a thoughtless lapse ... and I was sad to see so many women in Juno's age group in the theater (one of them actually pregnant) ... who'll be coming away with a false impression that could so seriously affect their lives!
The Savages: Wow, what a good movie! Philip Seymour Hoffman has had an amazing run this year between this, "Before the Devil Knows You're Dead," and that other movie with Tom Hanks ... the name of which is escaping me at the moment ... Charlie Somebody's War. Anyway - he and Laura Linney are just wonderful as siblings dealing with their aging/ailing father. Painful and real ... and set in gritty, wintry Buffalo ... in perfect contrast to Sun City. (The latter looks like a setting that would do David Lynch proud.) Check it out if you haven't seen it!
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